Reverend Windhorse

Some Pre-Nuptual Questions 

For You To Ponder

There are some questions I think are important to consider

before making a commitment to marry.  Of course, there

are zillions of questions that could be asked; as I go on I

hope to improve this list.  Your feedback and suggestions

are most welcome.

Have you ever explored your deep-set emotions, beliefs

and expectations of marriage?  

Just what do you expect from your mate after marriage?

What do you expect from yourself as a married partner?

Do you have a clear vision of what you want your Life to

be?  Where you want to live?  Number of children you

wish to bring into the world?  Would you consider adopting?

Do you and your partner stand united on all these questions?

Do you find it easy to explore and discuss difficult questions

with your mate?  Does a conversation end in conflict, in

silence from one or both of you?  Elation?  A feeling of

accomplishment, resolve and/or discovery?

Have you discussed the role you see for husband and for

wife in matrimony?  Does your mate's vision match yours?

Are either or both of you passionate about a religion, a 

movement or particular lifestyle?  Are you in accord on

these issues?  If you have different philosophies, how do

you see peaceful cohabitation possible?  How will you fit

together in your goals and actions?

What about your Wedding Celebration?  Are you 

compromising your dreams to please your partner or

feeling that you are in perfect accord?

Often an attitude is "Oh, why worry about these things?

"We'll work on it after the marriage!"

Surely your common sense tells you that to create balance

is a lot like keeping a kitchen must clean as you

go, and get sticky dough off pots immediately or they

harden and become tenacious.  The food you cook needs

preparation, cooking with method, and tending...regular

attention so that nothing boils over.

I appreciate speaking to you as a couple and delving into

some of these questions...Learn how to openly discuss

ideas, fears, concerns...stir your kettle so no ingredients

stick and burn; changing the flavor of your relationship.

A minimum of three sessions is helpful for opening deeper

dialogue.  While not compulsory, your firm foundation for

communication could benefit greatly.  The greater your

commitment to being the highest example of the greatest

you ... all the more dialogue can help your teamwork.

April 7, 2011

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