Some Pre-Nuptual Questions
For You To Ponder
There are some questions I think are important to consider
before making a commitment to marry. Of course, there
are zillions of questions that could be asked; as I go on I
hope to improve this list. Your feedback and suggestions
are most welcome.
Have you ever explored your deep-set emotions, beliefs
and expectations of marriage?
Just what do you expect from your mate after marriage?
What do you expect from yourself as a married partner?
Do you have a clear vision of what you want your Life to
be? Where you want to live? Number of children you
wish to bring into the world? Would you consider adopting?
Do you and your partner stand united on all these questions?
Do you find it easy to explore and discuss difficult questions
with your mate? Does a conversation end in conflict, in
silence from one or both of you? Elation? A feeling of
accomplishment, resolve and/or discovery?
Have you discussed the role you see for husband and for
wife in matrimony? Does your mate's vision match yours?
Are either or both of you passionate about a religion, a
movement or particular lifestyle? Are you in accord on
these issues? If you have different philosophies, how do
you see peaceful cohabitation possible? How will you fit
together in your goals and actions?
What about your Wedding Celebration? Are you
compromising your dreams to please your partner or
feeling that you are in perfect accord?
Often an attitude is "Oh, why worry about these things?
"We'll work on it after the marriage!"
Surely your common sense tells you that to create balance
is a lot like keeping a kitchen clean...you must clean as you
go, and get sticky dough off pots immediately or they
harden and become tenacious. The food you cook needs
preparation, cooking with method, and tending...regular
attention so that nothing boils over.
I appreciate speaking to you as a couple and delving into
some of these questions...Learn how to openly discuss
ideas, fears, concerns...stir your kettle so no ingredients
stick and burn; changing the flavor of your relationship.
A minimum of three sessions is helpful for opening deeper
dialogue. While not compulsory, your firm foundation for
communication could benefit greatly. The greater your
commitment to being the highest example of the greatest
you ... all the more dialogue can help your teamwork.
April 7, 2011